As defined by Merriam-Webster Dictionaries, appreciation is a noun which means a feeling of being grateful for something or even an ability to understand the worth, quality, or importance of something.
Thus saying, appreciation is an abstract something which any human needs to be driven enough to achieve things he wanted to achieve in his life. In everything, he does, especially that something that requires much an effort, anyone should be able to acknowledge it and do appreciate everything he has done to keep him moving with much of an inspiration through ups and downs. That no matter what outcomes will be at the end of his endeavors, although he is frustrated or disappointed, but he will never lose that spark in his eyes and the level of inspiration to move forward.
Hence, appreciation is really important to anyone. No matter how big or small his efforts done. They should be appreciated. Because in this big things or small things, they are made possible with effort.
But how can't I feel it in a home where I supposed to feel home?
Ever since, I haven't have much appreciation received from anyone. No matter how much efforts done to make everything they have observed possible, I always do feel unappreciated. I grew up in a home where less appreciation is observed. That's why, I'm so thirsty for it from other people since I know that I can't get it from home. As a result, a lot of stiff and stricken behaviors are observed by lot especially my boyfriend.
Insensitivity towards other people's efforts
Since I grew up not to care other people's efforts because I don't observe it at home, I usually have powerful mouth. Tactless mouth, I should say. I don't care if the words I am saying are okay or not. Lesser sensitivity. How insensitivity and appreciation connect? If you grow up in a home where it's strict, firm, full of disciplines and rules implemented to be a "perfect child", especially if you don't observe that it's good to acknowledge the other people especially with their efforts done to make things possible in the house, it has also greater chances that you grow insensitive. Since appreciation is again, needing emotions and sensitivity to make it.
Giving pressure vs appreciation
In my case, I did grew up in a family where I'm pressured to be on top of everything or even the best that anyone could ever meet and imagine. But, unfortunately, I didn't make it until college. Since I just graduated as is, without honors, medals, etc. Only the widely renowned "Diploma". Plus, I don't observe acknowledgements in the house like even just cleaning the house, sweeping the floors, etc. I don't receive any recognition to it. As a result, I do everything to be praised in the school or to wherever I need to be appreciated by them. Emancipation of appreciation is what is the most I really like. Like in every little things I do, I am hoping to be appreciated by anyone. May it be doing the laundry, sweeping the floor, etc. In these things I do for the family, I don't receive recognition from them. Instead, insults and narrating one by one my faults, lacks, all the negative criticisms, everything negative are being said. That's why, I am wondering how it feels like to be appreciated.
How it feels to be appreciated?
So, that's why when my boyfriend does that to me, no matter how simple or small endeavor I did, he does appreciate and even saying he's proud of me to these things. It felt good. So much. I wonder if my family does that to me, too.
I just remembered they were telling me that the culture of the house changed when I was not with them. I was in Makati then. So for two months, everything changed. Why? They just told me these things.
No one will cook for them especially dinner.
No one will clean the house and make it orderly at all times.
No one will look for the house during the day. Thus, worried about theft.
No one will do laundry and wash them everyday.
No one will make noise in the house.
No one will make cuddles to them.
More.
But, I never received any compliment from these things from them. So sad, but it is. That's why I told myself, when I have my own family, appreciation should be a duty to everyone so they will also learn sensitivity towards other people.
So...
Appreciation, wie kann man es fühlen? Nur eine wichtig Frage für Euch.
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