Tomorrow will say everything what I have done. My best, my efforts, my life, my path.
Tomorrow is the day I have waited after several months of studying both self-study and in formal language school.
I have not written any blog in this month because of super busy schedule and super tiresome day, everyday. So, I have not given myself an ample time to think and to reflect of what I have done in those days. However, I think I could say I have shared my life in this path. And with that, I can say that this is so far the best that I did which I really made efforts for. Why? I have reasons.
1. I have taken the challenge to be away from my family for months.
Which is really hard for me to do and so with my family, whom been with me since I was born. I should say. But then, I was able to bear that sad feeling leaving away from my dear hometown and try to adjust myself to the new environment and to the new society for several months. Without my family with me, I was able to know myself more in terms of my real beliefs, morals, and so on. Though I am with my cousin, but still I feel alone in this battle of adjustment towards my surroundings.
2. I have taken the challenge to speak the language which is not my mother tongue for several months and deal with new set of people.
To be honest, this is not my first experience to meet new people and be able to mingle with them since I was immersed to the intercultural thing way back college through leadership and active participation to university's activities before. But this is the first time that I have to live with the culture of the surrounding people like speaking their language which sounds new to me though I have learned it since kid, and to live and to cope with their living standards at the same time, which is new to me. But so far, in my total experiences here, I can say that I am happy that I am able to cope with this part, which I really consider the most challenging. For me, this is a jumpstart to the new or bigger or tougher coping abilities once I will be outside the country.
3. I have been able to gain new experiences apt for the environment I am in.
Since I arrived here in Makati, which is the Business Central District in the Philippines, I could see some little changes in the way I think such as being more open to the new possibilities of life and being able to receive every challenge and every new experience with optimal positivism or explicitly seen with a big smile midst big troubles. Throughout my stay here, I have experienced tougher challenges, problems here which I was not able to have before. That makes me more stronger here and makes me feel that I am a decision-maker. I decide on my own, I make things out of my own desires and not decisions made by others for me. These things made me feel certain that I have the capacity to decide and to make things on my own.
4. I have been able to see how important it is to have new set of experiences rather than stay to a routine.
Right now, I am able to realize that I have to make some new ideals to cope with the rapid changes in my surroundings. Apart from my fashion statement, which I redo to make me feel confidence with myself, I also decided that I need to live a healthy lifestyle. Because I need to be fit balance to my body. So, I can love myself more. I have loved myself in terms of intellect and beauty, but not yet with my body. I have hated it for so long. Now, with the new experiences that I have gained here, I have realized how important it is to be fit and try to make a big move towards healthy lifestyle.
5. I have been able to survive the risk that I have gone through.
Being able to live life with the new environment is never as easy as it sounds. But, with courage and inner strength, I was able to survive it. Thank you, Lord for guiding me, for being with me at all times. This time, I am more confident with myself.
In general, I am so thankful to everyone who helped me to surpass all these things.
a. My family, who have been ever supportive to me and to all my endeavors, who have heard my cries and complaints and for encouraging me all times and also, for sharing their love for me as their daughter/sister. They have never failed to arouse my drive to fight towards my new environment and reminded me to keep calm and stay upright at all times though I am in tough situations. Thank you so much, Pa, Ma, Hann.
b. My boyfriend, who have been always at my back who always tap my shoulder and reminding me not to worry because I am always doing good. He has been always my vent to all my cries and complaints, my happiness, my joys, my sadness, so on. He has been there to listen to me. He has never failed to show how much he cared and loved me. Thank you so much, Schatz.
c. My cousin, Hannah, who has been acting like my sister here. She has always been helping me unleashing the hotness in me. Helped me to be a better me than before and to be able to live up with the difficulties here in this big city where we are both living. Thank you so much, Badiyat.
d. My God, who has been always my Guide and Wisdom-Provider. He has always been my Protector in this wide busy streets, and protected me from ill-mannered people and bad elements in the society. He has always been my Teacher in times when I really don't know what to do and being the Protector of my family in CDO and in Germany. Thank you so much for giving me such blessings in life. I do cherish all these things You have provided me.
I am just so excited for tomorrow's exam and the next day's trip back to my hometown. Tschüss!
